Practices
Voyeur & exhibitionist
Watching and being watched, in person and on camera. Always within a consenting frame — voyeurism only works when everyone involved knows it's happening.
The turn-on of watching, and the turn-on of being watched, are two of the most common kinks people don't talk about. They're also the two kinks most likely to be done badly without negotiation — because watching strangers without their knowledge isn't voyeurism, it's harassment, and being seen by people who didn't sign up for it isn't exhibitionism, it's a criminal charge.
Done well, this category is some of the most fun a person can have with consent. Done badly, it harms uninvolved people. The difference is whether everyone in the frame agreed to be in it.
What it looks like across the spectrum
- Watching a partner with someone else, with explicit mutual agreement.
- Watching other people play at a party, club, or dungeon — where being watched is part of why those people are there.
- Being watched yourself while playing in shared space.
- Semi-public play — hotel balconies, private outdoor spots, after-hours places where no non-consenting person could see or hear.
- Cam or online exhibitionism: showing yourself on camera to a chosen audience.
- Sharing anonymized content publicly — cropped or face-blurred clips.
Negotiating the watching side
Watching a partner with someone else (sometimes called cuckolding when humiliation-flavored, or stag-vixen when celebratory) is its own kind of intimacy. It needs all the same conversations as opening a relationship — what's on the table, how to know if someone isn't okay, how to come back together afterwards — plus a specific extra: what does the watching partner actually want to see, hear, or know?
Negotiating the being-watched side
Playing in a shared space — a club, a dungeon, a party — means accepting that others may watch from a respectful distance. That's the deal. It does not mean accepting commentary, advice, joining in, or being filmed. House rules exist to enforce this; use them.
Online and recording
- Anything on a screen can be screenshotted. Assume permanence; share accordingly.
- Cam exhibitionism on platforms with paywalls and verified audiences is meaningfully different from posting to open social media.
- Recording yourselves privately is fine; sharing without per-person explicit consent is not — even with a partner.
The practices in this category · 6
Every practice in this category, in the same plain language used in the interests quiz.
Watching a partner with someone else
Watching your partner play with another person, in person, with full mutual consent.
Watching others at a party
Watching other people play at a club, party, or dungeon. House rules apply.
Being watched at a party
Playing in shared space with willing onlookers around you.
Semi-public play
Hotel balconies, private outdoor spots, after-hours places.
Safety: Only where nobody non-consenting could see or hear. Indecent exposure is a real charge in most places.
Cam / online exhibitionism
Showing yourself on camera to a chosen audience.
Sharing anonymized content publicly
Posting cropped or faceless photos / clips to wider audiences.
Want to mark how you feel about these?
The interests quiz walks you through every practice here on a six-point scale, then saves the result as a private inventory you can share with a partner.
Take the interests quiz →